Sunday, April 09, 2006

Elves

Zel thinks we have Elves that clean the house.

Granted, I don’t discourage this belief.

For example, the other night, we were getting ready to go to bed. I turned down the covers, Zel gets in and said, “Did you change the sheets?”

I said, “No. The Elves must’ve come out of their hiding place today.” Just for effect, I acted surprised.

Zel said, “Well, the Elves did a great job. I’ll have to thank them the next time I see them.”

“Well,” I said, “I’m sure the Head Elf would love to have her pussy licked.”

No response.

I mean, who else would change the sheets?

It’s not like Flof can change the sheets. I’m sure he would if he could. But he gives me this song and dance about, “I don’t have opposable thumbs”.

Flof also thinks it’s his job to dirty the house. He’s quite good at that right now: it’s springtime and he’s a shedder. I brush him frequently, but it’s kind of like trying to herd cats.

I get the same question from Zel about vacuuming and cleaning the bathrooms. I get the same “no opposable thumbs” excuse from Flof about doing housework.

Well, gotta go vacuum.

An Elf’s work is never done.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Song and dance about opposable thumbs. That's ha-lariously. What about Zel? Does he have opposable thumbs?

Amelia said...

Yes, and he mostly sits around with his opposable thumb in his A while the elves work. But, lately he's been pretty good because the head elf is pregnant.