Come on, let's blog!

"Let's start a blog," he said to me.

"Why?" said I.

"So we can let the world know how funny we are as a couple. And we can have Evie link from her blog to ours because that's blogger code," he said.

"Mm-hmm. And what's our topic?" I said.

"Us. Because we're funny and we can just blog about shit that happens in our relationship. I was thinking we could call it 'Old and Married'. What do you think?"

I said, "Maybe. But we're not so old, so maybe we should call it '(Not So) Old and Married'...."

He said ok. And it's been a week and I'm the only blogger on this blog. Sweet Jesus. So much for a team effort and quality time together. F-ing clown.

apples and oranges

So, this "Countdown to Armageddon" made me think of a couple of things:

1. "Armageddon It" by Def Leppard
2. Is it really the end of the world as we know it? Do I feel fine?

R.E.M. asks a much better question. But who's the better band? Given that Michael Stipe didn't write down early lyrics, and made the songs up each time they were sung, I give R.E.M. points for creativity. But, Leppard had Mutt Lang produce Pyromania...and Mutt's married to Shania Twain, and given that she's sorta-kinda hot (note: no second t, so she's not hott), Def Leppard gets points.

Really, though, comparing these two bands is like comparing apples and oranges.

No Negative Self Talk

The Alien Anal Probes participated in their fantasy football draft this past Saturday. Zel picked up Tom Brady, Domanick Davis, and Kevin Jones. So, the season looks like it could be promising. However, on tonight's Detroit/St. Louis game, the Anal Probes' kicker, Jeff Wilkins took a hit, but he's probably fine.

For hours now I've been listening to, "my team sucks" and "this season is gonna suck" and "I don't know why I play this stupid game" and "I hope I didn't just blow a bunch of money to loose at this crap".

I said, "no negative self talk! I'm not listening to that this year. The Anal Probes are going to have a GREAT season!"

He's not buying it. He's currently watching something on the History Channel called "Decoding the Past: Countdown to Armageddon, Part 2", which means there was a part 1. Super. Watch how theologians are philosophizing that the world as we know it is coming to a screeching halt. Funny how the only minister that made any sense on the show is a woman. And Zel says we're feeble-minded.

I love the fact that when Zel is crabby, he makes every effort to sink even lower in his pity party. Maybe he should be the president of the new club in town: Crabinovich and Grumpenstein.

He really understands, even though people say, "he's just a dog"

So, last night, Zel and I are getting ready to go out to meet some friends for some kick ass Mexican food. It was about 4:45 pm, 15 minutes before Flof is scheduled to eat. And Zel and I were in our bedroom, which is in the back of the house and I said, "do you think we should feed Flof (Four Legs of Fun) before we go or after we get back?" And Zel said, "well...." And I said, "we'll probably be gone for a few hours." And Zel said, "yeah...." And then, there was this whine from the living room, which is in the front of the house. It was Flof saying, "you guys! you need to feed me before you go, you guys!" And so Flof was fed before we left. Sweet Jesus that dog! He understands English, even though people say, "he's just a dog". He's not just a dog. He's the smartest goddamned German Shepherd in the world.

My Idol, remembered

I've been inspired by Evie Kelley and the modern girl's action adventure guide and her recent post about Billy Idol. I was also completely enamored with Billy. The first time I saw him was in 1983's "White Wedding". I wanted to be the bride and have my finger cut when he put the ring on my finger when we got married. My little girlfriends and I joked that the blood from the bride was true love. And then "Rebel Yell" came out and I didn't even know what a rebel yell was, but I was willing to do whatever it was and cry "More! More! More!" if Billy were to make sweet love to me. On New Year's Eve, MTV was throwing their New Year's Eve Party and I was at home with Mom and Dad and I remember Billy performing "Rebel Yell" on MTV that night. And Mom asked Dad what a rebel yell was, so Dad gave her a rebel yell. And I thought, "Yep, I'd definitely do that for Billy." I was 11. And they say kids don't know about sex. Whatever.

Zel and I were talking about Billy Idol and how Billy's the coolest thing since vanilla ice cream and how, if given the opportunity today, knowing what I know about sex, I'd still love to make sweet love to Billy. And Zel said, "He's gay", which is his rebuttal for every dude I think is hott. So hott they get a second t.