Comment of the Day, October 26, 2006

I went to the doctor for my six week post-delivery check up.

He said he was impressed on how well and how quickly I’ve healed, considering everything I went through in the delivery of Baby Kaos.

I said, “Did it look like a bomb went off?”

My doctor, who appreciated the humor, said, “No, but you did deliver a pretty big baby, and had a pretty serious tear.”

We also talked about birth control. Not that I’m overly interested in sex, but eventually I expect Zel and I will start having sex again.

When we got home, Zel said, “Well, I don’t really want to pay for birth control if my dick’s not going in your hole.”

Nice.

The Force

I’ve been trying to use The Force for the past several weeks.

Baby Kaos is four weeks old, and he’s a big eater. When he’s nursing, which is a lot of the time, I sit down and remember that I could use my drink of ice water, but I forgot it over on the table. So, I try to use The Force to levitate my drink of ice water over to me, but I haven’t been doing so well.

You’d think I’d just bring my drink of ice water over to the chair where I’m feeding Baby Kaos, but when you have a hungry and fussy infant in your arms, and every fiber of your being wants to sit down and give him some boob, you can’t help but forget your drink of ice water.

I’ve also been trying to use The Force to get us a blanket when Baby Kaos is eating. I thought perhaps the blanket and drink of ice water were too bulky. So, I tried to get smaller items, like cloth diapers, which I use to dry off my nipple and Baby Kaos’ mouth, over to me. No luck.

I’m not trying to lift an X-Wing Fighter out of the swamp. However, I know that size matters not, and I should be able to levitate the blanket, the cloth diaper, and the drink of ice water with the same amount of ease.

I’ll continue to practice using The Force. If anything exciting happens, I’ll let you know.